Ladies, klass is in session…Football 101, Lesson 1

First, I have to give a big old THANK YOU to all my family, friends and strangers who have shown me so much love and support since I launched my blog. I am having a blast!!

Now, lets get started. I had not planned to post again until Friday but I have quickly learned that in the blogging world you just go with the flow. Since my last post, I have gotten a lot of feedback from women who are anxious to learn more about sports. With the college football season starting tonight and NFL starting next week, I think it is only right that I help my ladies out a bit. So here it is, your first football lesson. Make sure you have your pen and paper ready :-}.

Uno) NEVER, EVER talk during the game unless you are talking about the game….
Uno A)but you can not ask questions. No one really wants to explain to you, during the game, what a safety is. Questions are only allowed during commercials and they should be very limited. Maybe three a game. Seriously.
Uno B)…if you are going to talk about the game, please, please, pleeeeeeeeease know what you are talking about. If the quarterback(QB) gets sacked(tackled and brought down to the ground while he still has the ball), DO NOT yell out offsides! If you do not know what you are talking about, please refer back to uno A.

Dos) The offense is the team with the ball. The defense is the team without. Easy, right?

Tres) There are 10 yards in a down. The offense gets four chances to gain the 10 yards. If the offense does not gain 10 yards, the other team gets the ball back. I already know I am going to have to revisit this topic.

Cuatro) A touchdown(TD) is worth six points. Always and forever.

Cinco) Typically after a touchdown, the kicker comes out to, yeah you guessed it, kick the ball through the uprights(the bars in the endzone that looks like an H). This is called a Point After Touchdown bka PAT and it is worth one point. It is NOT a field goal which is worth three points.

Seis) The person who throws the ball is the QB. Well, nine times out of 10 it is the QB. Just confused you, huh?

Siete) A football game typically lasts three hours. Give or take 15-30 minutes.

Ocho) If a game is tied at the end of regulation, the game goes into overtime(OT). We will get into that during another class.

Nueve) There are 11 offensive and 11 defensive players on the field at all times. If you count more than that on the field, somebody can not count.

Diez) A football field is 100 yards long and 53.5 yards wide. You can really impress a man if you drop that tidbit on ’em. Please do it in a casual manner.

Once) The endzone is the 10 yard area at the end of the field. The goal is to get the ball into the endzone thus resulting in a TD. The endzone typically has the home team’s mascot name spray painted in it.

Doce) Gridiron is another name for the football field. While we are at it, if someone yells out paydirt that means touchdown.

Want more knowledge until the next lesson? Watch SportsCenter!! It literally comes on like 12 times a day. Oh and SportsCenter is ESPN’s flagship program for those of you who do not know. If you happen to not know what ESPN is, then forget everything you read and go back to watching Lifetime.

Until next time…TOODELLS.

21 thoughts on “Ladies, klass is in session…Football 101, Lesson 1

  1. Marchelle

    Shannette – you would be amazed at how much I learned from this simple lesson! I may even think about actually watching a game!

  2. Kevin

    I have to clarify one point in your lesson. Questions are okay as long as you don’t try to argue the answer. Please do not try to tell me how that rule is stupid or does not make since to you when I give you the answer. I will gladly answer an unlimited amount of smart questions to help anyone, man or woman understand the game I love so much. However, if you try to second guess football you are going to lose my support.

  3. Kendra

    Yessssss! I knew everything discussed in the blog. However could you please address the whole pass interference call. I mean I get it but ain’t the whole point of it all is to keep the other guy from catching the ball? I’m just sayin.

    Great job friend!!!!

    1. Thanks Kendar!! Pass interference happens when the player does something that prevents the opposing player from having a chance to catch the ball. For example, holding onto the jersey, knocking the player to the ground, tripping, etc. You have to go after the ball, not the player.

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