New Year, Same You…

It is that time of the year again.

You know what time of the year I am referring to cause you have seen them all up and down your timeline for the last two weeks.

Time for all the ‘New Year, New Me’ posts. Or the things I’m doing different in the new year posts.

But check it.

A lot of these posts are from the same people that posted the same thing before 2015, 16 and 17 rolled up in here.

Now first, let me just say I am not knocking anyone who has a desire to make certain changes in their life. The first step is admitting you need to make those changes. However, I think a lot of people miss a very important step which almost ensures they will be in the same position at the end of the year that they were in the beginning.

They did not change their MINDSET.

Listen. THIS. IS. THE. KEY.

How do I know this? I had to do it to get to where I am today. I had to do it to allow my purpose to be revealed. I had to do it for peace of mind.

IT. STARTS. IN. THE. MIND.

Think about it. Pun intended.

Lets take working out for instance. You have made a decision that in 2018, you are going to incorporate consistent exercise into your life. Your health is not where it needs to be and your doctor has been encouraging you to begin a fitness regimen. You have kids you want to see grow up and become old so you say you are going to do it for them.

You start out strong in January. You are going to the gym five times a week for an hour. You are feeling good. You are taking your lunch to work. You are eating so much salad you are resembling a garden.

Everything is going good until mid-February when you are put in charge of a big project at work. Your work hours are longer. You are exhausted by the time you leave work. And it is cold.

Working out as a priority slowly fades to black. You look up and it is May. And that energy you had in January has disappeared. You think about the results you did not see. You think about the progress you did not make. You think about the goals you did not reach.

You look up again and it is December 31.

What just happened?

I can tell you what happened. Even though this is one example, it happens across many spectrums.

YOUR. MINDSET. WAS. WRONG.

You changed your actions but did you change your thoughts?

Our minds are sponges. They soak up A LOT if we allow them to.

But what are you allowing it to soak up?

What did you tell yourself when everything changed because of work?

Did you say to yourself – “It is always something.”

Did you say to yourself – “I am never going to lose this weight.”

Did you say to yourself – “I will start up again when I have time.”

If you said any of this then you had already defeated yourself before you had a chance to begin again.

We can be our own worse enemies – speaking death over our own lives.

Listen. Life is not perfect and that is one of the beauties of it. The ups, downs, round and rounds teach us so much about ourselves.

But it is what we tell ourselves in those moments that are tough, hard and challenging that determine how far we go and if we reach our goals. And it tells us everything about how we view ourselves whether we want to acknowledge that or not.

My friend Che says it all the time, “Life is hard.” Yes it is but that is not a bad thing. Hard does not have to be a negative because so many good things come out of hard times.

Hard times breed resiliency, determination, strength, courage, genorosity, creativity, humility, passion, compassion, perseverance, kindness, grace and love.

They help to pull out the good in you, if you allow them too. They also help to reveal those ugly parts that need to be eliminated, redirected or reworked. So do not fight them, embrace them. But embrace them with a thought process that you can overcome whatever obstacle you are facing.

Tell yourself that! Tell yourself how awesome and amazing you are. Tell yourself you are an overcomer. Tell yourself that you will accomplish that goal or dream. Tell yourself you will lose the weight. Tell yourself you will eat healthier. Tell yourself you will become a better you in 2018.

But then do not get upset when you have a “setback.” That is life. And life happens. Remember it is not perfect and it is hard. But what sets you apart is how you respond to it. If you beat yourself down about it then you know what you have done, wasted time you cannot get back. But if you say to yourself, “You know what self, you did not get it done today but you get another chance tomorrow. You can do this!” you will be more likely to get it done than you would be had you taken the other route.

And while I am at it, let me encourage you that when it comes to changing your mindset to one that craves positivity, please be mindful of the things you watch and the people whom you allow to experience you up close. That people part. Yeah, THAT. IS. KEY.

PROTECT. YOUR. MIND.

And watch things change for the better.

Even if your circumstances do not reflect it right away, your actions will. Your responses will. Your approach to life will.

BELIEVE. IN. YOU. Speak LIFE over yourself. Maintain your TUNNEL VISION. Get back UP when you fall down. Live WITHIN the CONFINES of TODAY. Listen to music that UPLIFTS you. IMPLEMENT the plan you wrote down. Converse with people who will KEEP IT REAL with you. Converse with people who INSPIRE you. Converse with people who CHALLENGE you. Take RISKS. And READ, READ, READ.

YOU CAN DO THIS!!! The REAL reward is in the JOURNEY not the destination.

Cheers to 2K18 and those renewed, positive minds that are going to propel you forward into your destiny!

 

 

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Finding balance within the grind…

I wear many hats. I am a freelance writer. I am a certified personal trainer. I am a group exercise instructor. I am a community servant. I am an advocate. I am a DJ. I am a public relations consultant. I am a marketing specialist. I am a youth development coordinator. I am an event planner. Add to that my dedication to my family, healthy living and my love of eating and what you will find is a person who is grinding in her purpose but is still struggling with finding that happy balance in her life. 

One of the best decisions I ever made, well God made it for me, was to move back to my hometown. I get questioned all the time about why I moved back. I used to find myself giving this long explanation but now I simply say because this is where I am supposed to be. Moving home has opened so many new doors of opportunity that it would take all day to list them. I am grateful for all of them. However, now I find myself having a dilemma. How do you balance it all when your plate is full and you still want to put more on it and you know more will be put on it but you are currently struggling to find a place for it all?

In eight days I will be 36 – I know you are counting down with me – and I have made it my personal mission to find a balance that works for me in my new year. For the past few years, I have put a lot of time and energy into my branpire(brand + empire) and not enough time and energy into myself and those that I love. I understand my grind and most of those close to me understand it. However, that does not mean operating at this current level is acceptable. 

A few months ago one of my close friends, who grinds just as much as I do issued me the reality check I needed. It was early one morning and I was still up working on a project. We were texting and I made the mention of being #TeamNoSleep. I promptly received a reply telling me to go to sleep as I was chastised for such ridiculous goal. My friend then proceeded to remind me how important sleep is no matter what our goals are.

I was shocked because the texter would routinely be up until 3 and 4 o’clock. I had the texts to prove it. But something had changed. That last text that was sent was simple but on my end it was powerful. I was running on fumes and my mood sometimes reflected it. I found myself being irritable, annoyed and had little patience for certain situations. I knew something had to give. 

I live a great life. It is very fulfilling. However, I want more of what makes me happy. I want more time spent with my family and friends. I want more time spent reading under the dogwood tree with my feet firmly planted in the grass. I want more time spent running. I want more time spent traveling. I want more time spent writing leisurely. I want more time spent on adventure. I want more time spent resting. I want more time spent eating pizza. I want more time spent laughing. And we all know how much I like to laugh and eat pizza. 

As the years have rolled on, I am appreciative and thankful of the fact that I am constantly in a state of growth. I am learning so much about me as I embrace exactly who God created me to be. I know that everything that worked for me at 30 will not work for me in the coming years. I know that I am living out my purpose even if certain circumstances do not reflect that currently. I know that the best is yet to come. 

And I know that in Year 36, I am going to get what I want. Watch me. 

 

#CheersToTheBalancedLife

 

This moment :-}

 

 

Life happens.

I have not blogged since March. 

I have had a lot of things I could have said. I have had a lot of things I have wanted to say. I have even had time to write out those thoughts, at times. I just have not taken the time to do it. At least not on here. And I am ok with that.

In the past, I have been very hard on myself if I did not write consistently for the blog. I tried have tried to make sure I am always addressing the hot topics. I have tried to make sure I am always posting at least once a week. I have tried to keep my blog fresh to satisfy my followers and to attract new visitors.  

But life happens. And life has happened over the past few months.

I have had my hands in so many projects that it came as no surprise, to me, that The Korner is lacking content. And I am ok with that.

Life happens. I got bit by a dog. I recovered getting bit by a dog. In some ways, I am still recovering. I took one of the best trips of my life. I have done some more traveling. I turned 35. I went to Carowinds. I planned, executed and directed an overnight summer camp for three weeks. I managed a pool. I trained clients. I engaged in thought provoking conversations via social media. I wrote columns for my hometown newspaper. I had a sleepover with my nephew. I addressed controversial topics on Facebook. I attended my family reunion. I took on new projects. I went to a couple of concerts. I hiked up a mountain. I played in some waterfalls. Oh and I went tubing with my family!

So I have been busy, living life. Fun is what happened.

Instead of fussing at myself for not keeping everyone informed and entertained, I let life happen.

In the process of letting life happen, I finally let myself embrace something I had begun to notice a little over a year ago. I no longer want The Korner to be mainly a sports blog. My thoughts land on so many topics outside of sports. I have never been hesitant to address those topics but I have been hesitant to direct my blog into another direction. Why? Who knows?

What I do know is that life happens. And in the midst of it happening, I have realized it is time to breath fresh life into The Korner. This included changing the look, the byline and the feel of the site. 

I love writing. I love sharing my thoughts. I love engaging in healthy discussions. 

And I love letting life happen. We were not designed to be stagnant, complacent or hamster wheel runners. We were designed to evolve, grow and blossom. Let life happen. I guarantee you are missing out if you do not allow it. How will you ever know what you are capable of if every time you encounter a situation that wants to force you out of your comfort zone, you plant your feet deep into the sand? Life does not happen there and it will keep on passing you by.

Get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Break out of that box! That is where all the magic is. Quit conforming to what the world wants from you. Stop wondering why you are miserable. Step out on faith. Allow yourself to be challenged. 

And let life happen! Cheers!

 

Til next time….whenever that may be :-).